Dream on....

One of the things that I’d never regret bout coming to Ireland is the fact that this experience has opened up my mind and reminded me how what we wish could really come true sometimes. I always believe that when I want something in my life and my heart tells me that I can do it, then it will indeed happen just like I wish it to be. Although it is not always true all the time *duh*. Going to Europe was something I wish to do though it was not my biggest dream, not something I was dying to do. So my purpose applying for exchange was not to see Europe, not to be extraordinary or cool, not to be adventurous because I don’t think I am although many people would probably perceive me as being one. Funny that come to think about the reason coming here again, I’m not so sure after all. Maybe I was just being impulsive as I sometimes am, and without realizing it, I am diving into a strong current.

“When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.” – Paulo Coelho

Whatever the reason is, coming here made me realize that it’s not impossible to do crazy things sometimes, things you never imagine you’d actually do. The realization of me actually having the power to do that, having the control to make a decision and do something not so ordinary amazes me because I didn’t actually realize I could do that you see. For a while I was happy seeing that life could be unpredictable and full of adventure. I remember consulting someone who’s been on exchange before when I was making my decision to come here. That conversation over lunch was not planned and I was surprised to find out that he went for an exchange before, alone too. I remembered him telling me that experience was a great eye-opener, despite being alone, and about coming back being a different person. “Different”…how different could it be I thought.

Well I’m not coming back that different I guess, if you are talking about my body weight =P. I have not adopted any Irish drinking habits, I still don’t like ‘chips’ that much, my accent hardly change at all of course. *it’s four months only* but I guess my mindset does change a little. So the thought of coming back to the mundane life in Singapore gets me feeling reluctant. Sometimes I think Singapore is really a place where people live too fast and your dreams get killed and finally kills u too with chronic depression. Mind you this is hidden under the masquerade of scholarships in the world’s 48th top university =P. Kiddin. I’m still grateful to the ever generous Singapore government haha…

And then recently I was in a period of confusion which happens occasionally. So I believe that I could make my wish come true and that some things you never imagine could happen. But then sometimes, believing too much could mislead you. After being very much convinced I was doing the right thing by following what my heart desires to do about a particular matter, suddenly I started questioning whether I’m being unrealistic after all. Couldn’t describe how sad I felt to let go of things I have foolishly believed could come true. There I was giving up, worse in an i-told-you-so and now-then-you-realise situation. But I knew I have to move on, and so I have decided to.

So as I just finished my last bite of butter crunch cookies which is my latest addiction btw, let me finish my piece of crap. This piece of crap is to remind myself in the future, or maybe any of you, about the power of dreams. May I have enough dreams to keep me living but not too much that I forget to keep my feet on the ground.

“It is the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” –Paulo Coelho